Self- Improvement

During and after my morning meditation today, I contemplated the issue of self-improvement. Most humans at various points in their lives contemplate the necessity of self-correction and self-improvement. Now, to be clear, I think it is admirable and healthy to do whatever we can to improve the quality of our lives here on the earth plane. We aspire to enhance our lives by improving our mental, physical and emotional health, by eating more nutritious foods, exercising, improving our relationships, setting goals and working toward them. It is always wise to make it a consistent practice to reassess our lives and lifestyles and try to make the necessary changes to better it.

Where we all tend to run into a roadblock is when we decide we need to change who we are by discarding the old version of us and recreating ourselves. Could it be that we are trying to change behaviors and make better choices so that we can begin to remember who we really are, not change it? So here are the questions that are at the heart of this perplexing dilemma. Who are we really? Is it truly possible to fully know and understand who we are in terms of the greater picture of life? Is it ok to not fully have the answers to these questions?

I believe that sometimes the questions, on some level, need to remain just that, questions, at least for the moment. Being spiritual beings having a physical experience is both joyfully growth-enhancing and deeply painful at times. The roles we play during any lifetime come and go as we move through various life changes. Yet up until the end of our lives most of us will respond to the question of who we are by listing all the roles we have played, are playing and will play. For example, I, Drusilla Burrough, am a daughter, a sister, a wife, a mother, and a friend. In the past, I was a dancer, a competitive swimmer, a gymnast and a cheerleader. Presently I am a massage therapist, an author, a spiritual counselor and an intuitive. In the future I will possibly be a retired person, hopefully a senior in her golden years, and perhaps I might be defined by a health issue or disability, although I hope not. All those labels are true at any given time. However, is that who I really am and if I should lose all my labels, do I lose my identity and or purposefulness? I do not believe so because what we do and who we are, are different. Each of our experiences can help us to learn, grow and hopefully move closer to the mystery of who we ultimately and eternally are. The doing part of us refers to the word human in the term human being. The word being refers to the part of us that is the consciousness and awareness that is aware of what the human is doing. The being part is what we call the soul.

This leads us to the great mystery of who we are. I believe, as most people do, that each of us was created by a supreme being. This being is called many things in many different cultures. The truth is that He[1] is rather mysterious and it is almost impossible to grasp His depth, vastness and power. I know we feel His energy and love. Many talk to Him regularly and believe they hear His messages, but, I often wonder if anyone has ever really seen Him. We create different images of Him, but I think it is from our imaginations and not from a memory of having seen Him. Yet, one thing most agree upon is that this supreme being is synonymous with love. He is love in its most perfect and divine sense.

One thing is true, for sure, our world along with the many galaxies that exist leaves us all in awe of our creator. On our beautiful earth, the diversity of life, the spectacular array of oceans, rivers, mountains, deserts, plants, trees, flowers, animals and every single eternal soul that has ever lived leaves us awe struck. We marvel at the constant change of seasons and cycles of life that keep us all wondering how in the world our creator can keep it all going. Yet, year after year life continues. He is the greatest enigma we will most likely ever know and, within that unknown lies the mystery of who we truly are.

So, here is the thing. If this being’s DNA, so to speak, is only love and He creates eternal beings called souls using that pure love, then our souls are made of love and only love. It also means that we too can embody and have access to all the power, knowledge, wisdom, complexity and creative ability of our creator. I tend to truly believe this is who we are! Impossible, you might say! It does feel impossible to see our selves in that light. Why? I believe the answer lies in our inability to really unravel the mystery of who or what our creator really is. If we cannot fully understand exactly who He is then, being his offspring, we cannot fully understand who we are. In addition, when we decide to incarnate here on earth, we must merge the energy of our soul with a physical body which incorporates an individual brain chemistry and ego mind. This is not always easy especially for younger and more immature souls. If our souls fail to successfully merge with our body, our life will be more ego driven rather than soul directed. As our soul evolves and matures, sometimes over many lifetimes, we can eventually tune in to the voice of our soul as well as our spirit guides and begin to get a clearer picture of who we are eternally. I believe there will be a point along the path of our soul’s journey, perhaps when we are closer to returning to our spiritual birthplace, where we will uncover all the mysteries of our creator, but I have not yet met anyone who has fully succeeded in that endeavor. 

 So here is where we may want to simply choose to leave the question of who we fully and completely are, unanswered and be content with that. Simply know that we are love at our very core. We are loved deeply by our creator simply because we exist. We make mistakes and learn our lessons. When we fall or feel as if we have failed, we need to remember that our mistakes and seeming failures do not define us. They are simply lessons, that teach us to be kinder and more forgiving to ourselves and others. If we all make accepting and being the love that is our truest identity, at the heart of what inspires and motivates us, we will always be on the right path. Then, no matter how much of who we are remains unknown, it will not matter. We will be proud of ourselves, feel fulfilled, grateful, enlightened and wonderfully embraced by the light and love of our mysterious and loving creator. I will leave you with this mantra to be repeated whenever we doubt ourselves, “I am love.”

[1] I do not believe our creator is either male or female but, a combination of both energies. For simplicity, however I will refer to our creator as He.